SVYTLANA "SVEE" FARONA

It's hard moving on from the things you've done wrong
When they play in your head like an old-fashioned song

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• svee/minfilia
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(this carrd is a constant wip, some links are hidden/broken)svee is my character from FFXIV, but her story and lore is incredibly divergent from game canon.
this is my sandbox and im playing :) (i don't rp! sorry! i just like writing)note: svee uses masc terms. call her "ser" (sir) instead of "ma'am/miss", "handsome" not "pretty", etc.

art by snooze

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BASICS

PERSONALITY

Cynical, pessimistic, and aloof, with her head constantly up her own ass, “Svee” Farona is perhaps Hydaelyn’s worst choice for a Warrior of Light, unless her idea of a good WOL is a major fixer-upper.Svee goes through her life with a “fuck you, got mine” attitude; no matter what, her priorities are always on self-preservation, and she puts her interests before the safety of others almost every time. This is in direct contrast to her role as Hydaelyn’s chosen, and proves a frequent struggle for her. Svee often blatantly refuses to see the world outside of her narrow sphere and acknowledge that some things are more important than her, insisting that only herself and those closest to her matter. After a childhood of neglect and blame, she finds herself unable to believe that anyone other than her has her best interest at heart. She is also painfully stubborn, often insisting that she is right even when she is very clearly in the wrong, and digging her heels in when people attempt to prove otherwise.Svee drifts from occupation to occupation feeling unhappy and unfulfilled, chasing anything that might offer her stability but denying herself anything that might bring her happiness. She speaks in a blunt, dry manner, often using deadpan jokes and sarcasm to express her humor. That’s if she speaks, however — Svee says as little as she can get away with, and will try to remain as impersonal as possible in what she does say. She isn’t interested in casual conversation, and insists that she doesn’t do “small talk”. People often find her impersonal, cold, or even cruel because of this, and many do not even know anything about her; she does this on purpose, in an effort to keep people from getting close to her.She is relatively shallow, and does not hide the fact that she will sleep with almost any pretty femme who gives her the time of day. She’s a terminal womanizer, earning enough of a reputation that the Admiral was aware of (and annoyed by) her antics during her time in the Maelstrom. She is rather full of herself when it comes to getting someone to come home with her, but lacks confidence with emotional intimacy. She has never had a relationship previously, often ghosting anyone who might be interested in her, but begins a steady relationship with Minfilia shortly after joining the Scions.Svee is fundamentally loathes the gods and religion, in direct contradiction to her wife’s fervent belief in Hydaelyn. She believes herself to be outside of the reach of fate, fully believing that she can make her own choices, and that she is above anything that might ask her to choose anything other than herself. She is initially very bad at being the WOL; she has no interest in politics, will refuse to cooperate if something does not either interest or immediately threaten her, and is not interested in any grand cause. She has zero interest in serving or even respecting Hydaelyn, and sees her role as the WOL as a burden, rather than a blessing. She often refuses to take credit for her actions as the WOL, instead stating that she is simply following Minfilia’s orders.She is prone to obsessiveness and possessive tendencies. She is obsessed with control in all situations, and always seeks to have the upper hand. She does not like to be seen as vulnerable or exposed, and wants to give off an aura of unshakable confidence and security, despite being deeply insecure and lonely. She does not accept help easily, frequently isolates herself, and is extremely introverted. Public appearances are not her strong suit, but she is an excellent leader on the battlefield, due to her fierce practicality and level-headedness during combat. Her relationship with Minfilia devolves into possessiveness and toxicity due to her desire to pull Minfilia into her shallow worldview, believing herself to be the only one that can protect her, and this eventually leads to their (temporary) separation.People who have managed to befriend her note that she still struggles to express her affections with words — instead, you'll find she'll offer to repair your gear, or she'll make you gifts. She is well aware of some of her shortcomings, and, when she really cares about someone, makes an effort with her actions to make up for her lack of verbal grace. Prior to Shadowbringers, however, she still keeps herself guarded; even those closest to her do not know her true intentions, and she continues to trend toward selfishness over anything else.Over the course of the storyline, Svee’s behavior improves — she is forced to confront her flaws, instead of running from them, like she had done every time before. She is a very static person, who will refuse to change unless given no other choice. Svee learns over time to be gentler with her words and more forgiving and understanding of others; she learns to give others the benefit of the doubt, learns that not everything revolves around her, and learns to be humble in a more genuine way.By Endwalker, she is much more easy-going; she frequently makes dad jokes, laughs loud and often, and has an air of self-assured confidence that she previously could not even attempt to fake. She learns to let go and live a little, and stops being so self-obsessed that she fails to acknowledge that other people matter. Deep down, she has always had a desire to be recognized and a sensitive heart, but trauma made her insist on living while hiding behind a front, rather than letting anyone see her true personality. She learns to love, and loves hard, but without running away from being emotionally vulnerable, or clinging so hard that it hurts other people. She learns to apologize for her mistakes, and she and Minfilia re-establish their relationship seven years later, after the event of Minfilia’s rebirth (in her storyline).

— Really I just love the idea of a WOL being someone who is really, really bad at it — someone who has to continuously decide to do The Good Thing. Someone who isn’t already a great hero and has to be convinced to leave their own personal agenda for the sake of others. And someone who, throughout it all, learns to be better.

PHYSICAL TRAITS

BUILD: Muscular and stocky. Not chiseled, but muscle is still visible — especially in her arms and back. Basically flat-chested, with little to no curves. Use the m!miqo'te model or Abby from TLOU2 as body references for her. Paws, with additional fur running up her calves — both her thighs and calves are slightly shorter to accomodate for the extra height.EYES: Both previously different shades of green; now right white, left green. White eye is blind.SKIN: Tanned, warm-toned. Miqo’te clan markings are only visible on the un-scarred side of her face. Scar extends from eyebrow down the side of her neck and arm (some older art doesn’t show the arm part). Arm part of scar has a vague lightning-bolt pattern.

VOICE: (Voiceclaim is Brandi Carlile). Low to mid-tone, rough, cracks if she raises her voice. Has a lot of power in her voice even though she doesn’t speak very loud, and tone is somewhat monotone/flat. Heavy accent, confuses people often because they can't pinpoint what kind of accent it is (she's just a Turali using pirate lingo). Forces her voice lower than it naturally is. A good singer, but quite embarrassed about it, and unlikely to perform.ETC: Long ears, with long fur and black spotted tufts on the ends. Ears rarely go “up”, are usually straight back when relaxed. Nails grow more to resemble claws. Fangs. Only wears one earring, usually on her right. Depending on the age, has graying hair.OUTFITS & GEAR
All gear is somewhat modified, because she has paws, and I like to take artistic liberties.May show her stomach and arms but will NEVER show her legs (won't wear shorts or pants with cutouts) (no one knows why she does this). She only uses Suzaku weapons. Prefers things with leather and fur trim. Not a fan of plate armor. Does not wear “feminine” clothes like dresses, blouses, etc.

THE NAME THING

Svee changes her name after being kicked out of her family and gives herself a new name to try and “reinvent” herself, but it sort of backfires. She doesn’t want to feel “seen” at all, and then when she does want to feel seen, she can’t go back on it. She won’t even tell people “Svyla” half the time. Just Svee. Her trust issues run so deep that she feels like she dug a hole for herself where no one even knows her real, actual name, because she’s got a shaky sense of identity and is scared to lose it.(i really like name narratives!! and secret names only special people know, etc)

TRIVIA

- she is a morning person and takes her coffee black, likes to be up before the sun rises and get some work done or read before she has to do anything
- learns to play guitar as one of the many hobbies she picks up after ARR (while minfilia is gone) to keep herself occupied. she likes to play folk-esque songs
- in modern AUs she’s usually a history major/has a history degree
- she can’t use magic anymore, but still is really interested in magic theory and aether studies
- not the biggest fan of chocobos at first - grew up around griffons
- people tend to assume she’s Lominsan, and she just lets them. she tries to imitate a Lominsan accent, but does have a bit of pirate speech in her voice
- can tolerate the heat well, but gets cold easy
- gender-wise she doesn’t care about being referred to as a woman but doesn’t like gendered terms like ma’am/miss/etc (use masc terms). she doesn’t like to think about it too hard.
- she loves children, and attempts to parent any sorry teen who crosses her path; she also loves baby animals, and believes wholeheartedly that animals are often better than people

ALIGNMENT: True Neutral
“True neutral characters are concerned with their own well-being and that of the group or organization which aids them. They may behave in a good manner to those that they consider friends and allies, but will only act maliciously against those who have tried to injure them in some way. For the rest, they do not care. They do not wish ill on those they do not know, but they also do not care when they hear of evil befalling them. Better for others to suffer the evil than the true neutral and his allies. If an ally is in need, the true neutral will aid him, out of genuine love or because he may be able to count on that ally a little more in the future. If someone else is in need, they will weigh the options of the potential rewards and dangers associated with the act. If an enemy is in need, they will ignore him or take advantage of his misfortune.A true neutral character will keep his word if in his best interest. He may attack an unarmed foe if he feels it necessary. He will not kill, but may harm an innocent. He may use torture to extract information, but never for pleasure. He will never kill for pleasure, only in self-defense or in the defense of others. A true neutral character may use poison as long as there is an overwhelming need. He will help those in need if it is in his best interest and works well alone or in a group. He responds well to higher authority until that authority attempts to use the law to hamper his ability to pursue his own self-interest. He will follow the law unless breaking it is in his best interest and he's reasonably sure that he will not be caught. He will never betray a family member, comrade, or friend unless the situation is dire. True neutral characters are indifferent to the concepts of self-discipline and honor, finding them useful only if they can be used to advance their own interests.Possible adjectives describing true neutral characters: diplomatic, judgmental, enigmatic, aloof, distant, self-reliant, mediatory, even-handed, fair, indifferent, and impartial.”— xMBTI: ISTP
People with an ISTP personality are results-oriented. When there is a problem, they want to quickly understand the underlying cause and implement some type of solution. ISTPs are often described as quiet, but with an easy-going attitude towards others.ISTPs enjoy new experiences and may often engage in thrill-seeking or even risk-taking behaviors. They often engage in risky or fast-paced hobbies such as motorcycling, hang gliding, bungee jumping, surfing or ice hockey. In some cases, they may seek out adventure by choosing careers in areas such as racing, flying, or firefighting.They prefer to make judgments based upon objective criteria rather than personal beliefs or values. ISTPs are not well attuned to the emotional states of others, and they can sometimes be seen as a bit insensitive. They also distance themselves from their own emotions, ignoring their feelings until they become overwhelming.One common myth about ISTPs is that they are the stoic, silent type. While they do tend to be reserved, this does not mean that they do not experience strong emotions. Instead, they are good at keeping a cool head, maintaining their objectivity, and coping with crisis.

first art by andrea, rest by me

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WARNING FOR MSQ SPOILERSI get very canon-divergent, so be aware that Svee will often veer off the course of the canon game story for the sake of the story I'm telling with her. If the lore doesn't match up, I did that on purpose. Changes are made to better fit her specific character, and some events she is simply not present for at all, rather than having her precisely follow story.Svee's entire MSQ timeline takes approximately 10 years.
She is around 30-31 at the start of ARR, and around 40 at the end of ENDW.

above art by noctli

• PRE-ARR - SB
• SHB - EW (TBA)

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BACKGROUND

Events leading up to ARR
Classes: Rogue, Gladiator

Born in the wilds of Shaaloani somewhere outside Sheshenewezi Springs, Svee grew up with strained family relations and detachment from both her relatives and her peers; as the youngest of seven and the "runt of the litter", she was often ignored or regarded with distaste. Rumors surround her birth, with many suspecting her mother's infidelity as the reason for her lack of family resemblance.Her self-inflicted injury is a blight upon her family; they see her situation as not an accident but a curse. They tell her to run, and to never look back.Homeless and adrift at the age of fourteen, Svee flees, finding her way to Tuliyollal and stowing away on a ship. She makes her way across the salt to La Noscea, hiding within the cargo, and sneaks between boats during their stops. She mistakenly makes her way onto a pirate ship, and is discovered quickly by the crew; they agree to let her stay, however, as long as she promises to earn her keep.Her birthname is lost to time, and she wishes for it to remain buried. While on the ship, she decides to choose her own name, but, overwhelmed by insecurity and afraid to let anyone close, she only tells people "Svee".Svee remains a pirate until the age of nineteen, when her crew is captured by the Maelstrom and forced to surrender. Merlwyb gives her an ultimatum — serve time for the thievery and crimes they have committed, or join the Maelstrom.Being the workaholic that she is, Svee throws herself into the work and rises to the rank of Lieutenant in her five years of service. She's unliked by most of her colleagues, however, due to her harsh tongue and incredibly strict and impersonal attitude.The conflict between her and her cohorts and the near-monotony of her work leads to tension, which then leads to somewhat of a breakdown as she realizes she does not feel like she has a place in the world. Unable to continue work and struck with a mid-mid-life crisis, she resigns from her position in the Maelstrom and decides to continue as a sellsword, a week before the fall of Dalamud. She hopes to maybe find some semblance of self-identity, but all she finds is an unending sense of restlessness, and a furthering of her trust and isolationist issues.

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THE SCAR INCIDENT

Overlooked by her family and desperate for attention and recognition, fourteen-year-old Svee turns to thaumaturgy, determined to become the best Black Mage the Shroud has ever seen. She manages to sneak away a hefty amount of advanced tomes on thaumaturgy, and, in her eagerness and insatiable ambition, jumps ahead much further than she should.This quite literally explodes in her face.Due to either an innate lack of ability or a lack of practice, or both, Svee lacks the ability to balance her mana, and cannot cast ice spells to restore her own MP. Overloaded with fire aether, the staff shatters, scarring her and permanently blinding her eye.(You can read this in comic form here.)This leads to a mana deficiency, rendering her incapable of casting spells and dramatically limiting her ability to manipulate aether.- can’t teleport easily (similar to Thancred)
- can’t cast ice spells at all, can produce some fire/sparks but nothing substantial
- starts trying to “physical therapy” it with RDM during Stormblood; this backfires — getting pulled to the first at the end of SB patches totally rids her of her remaining ability to use MP and aether
- can only use MP for a very limited amount of time before she’s forced to stop or swap weapons
- can’t use paladin abilities, so up until the end of SB she’s a gladiator still; when she picks up warrior she also can’t use the healing skills/passive abilityShe eventually just learns to live with it.

A REALM REBORN

Approximate time frame: 4 years
Classes: Rogue, Gladiator

After losing five years of her memory from the Calamity and leaving the Maelstrom in a crisis of identity and a particularly bad bout of depression, a purposeless and antsy Svee makes herself known as a particularly talented sword-for-hire and commissioned blacksmith. Through a twist of fate, perhaps serendipity, she happens upon Thancred during a mission in La Noscea.Thancred notices something special about her. He has a proposition for her, and urges her to follow him back to meet his boss — someone he thinks she would be inclined to meet. Purely because she has nothing else to do, she follows him, but tells him she makes no promises.Minfilia is kind enough in her eloquent introductions of her organization’s purpose, but Svee finds no real meaning in her words of saving the world from imminent collapse — this is beyond her comprehension, as someone who rarely considers others outside of herself — but, for some reason, she finds herself staying to listen to the woman’s speech in its entirety. Svee isn’t interested in the glory or the fame, or to be the one doing the right thing. She isn’t really in it for any reason at all, and certainly not because some people she’s never heard of say she’s a chosen one. However… the job is consistent, and it gives her a place to crash. Despite wanting to remain unattached, she finds herself craving consistency, and accepts the invitation as a hired sword.She pretends that she doesn’t care. She pretends so hard, and, for the most part, it’s true. She doesn’t believe in Hydaelyn, she doesn’t believe in a higher purpose, and she isn’t so sure about the roots and motives of this organization she’s found herself in the center of. But the Antecedent is charming, and she’s taken an interest in Svee. Svee finds herself drawn in by Minfilia’s words, wit, and wisdom, and she begins to involve herself more voluntarily in Scion missions — though, of course, she continues the act of keeping her walls up and her mouth shut.After one late night and a few drinks, and then several more late nights following, Minfilia and Svee begin to form a relationship. Svee finds herself tied to something — someone — for the first time in her life, and she starts to find a particular kind of pride in carrying out her missions to completion. Her relationship to the Antecedent is kept on the down-low, but rumors begin to spread; some believe it to be a publicity stunt, purely intended to foster a more positive reputation for the publicly-scrutinized Svee.Svee fully expects everything to remain as it is, for the rest of her life, and she begins to want this. She defeats monsters, she plays the part of the hero, she continues contributing to her fiancée’s organization’s cause, and she hopes she’s doing the right thing. She doesn’t want more, and she’s certainly had less.

The semblance of peace in her life is beginning to unravel with the events of the Praetorium; Svee finds herself truly tested, while also finding herself in opposition of Hydaelyn — the goddess she had previously heard reference to, but never felt the influence of. This unnerves her, distrustful of beings beyond her realm of comprehension, and the tension between her and Hydaelyn grows as she suspects she’s being manipulated for Hydaelyn’s unknown motives. The presence of the mysterious figures known as the Ascians only furthers her anxiety, and this is amplified when the Ascian Nabriales kidnaps Minfilia.A sudden change in pace forces Svee into preservation mode, and she begins to shut herself down again, trying to desperately hold onto the life she’s begun to create. More and more, she is being forced into the limelight as the hero and the savior, and she begins to want nothing more than to retreat; she finds herself unable to leave Minfilia, however, and remains by her side, following with her plans but remaining quiet and tensely contemplative. She becomes increasingly overprotective after the interactions with Nabriales, and begins to put Minfilia on a pedestal — considering herself the only one who can truly protect her, and seeing it as her sworn duty. With Thancred's absence (due to Lahabrea), no one is able to intervene, and she becomes possessive of Minfilia.Investigations on the primals and observations on the Garlean war of succession continue, and the Crystal Braves are established by Alphinaud as the Scions' militia.Two weeks married, Svee and Minfilia plan to announce their relationship officially at a special banquet being held in Ul’dah. The esteemed Warrior of Light is requested for a private meeting with Nanamo; Svee is apprehensive, not used to public appearances, but she agrees to meet with the Sultana. This abruptly backfires, however — and she is suddenly being framed for murder.The Crystal Braves have betrayed them, and the Scions are under arrest for conspiracy and regicide. Svee’s innocence cannot be proven; her public image is already struggling, due to her unsavory personality, and not many are willing to come to her defense — Minfilia attempts to argue for her innocence, but is met with backlash from Teledji. Rumors about her relationship with the Warrior of Light reflect poorly on her, and she is accused of conspiring with a supposed murderer. Raubahn creates a distraction, and Svee and the other Scions begin to flee.While fleeing through the tunnels, the Scions are split apart, until only Svee and Minfilia remain. They continue to search for an exit, but Minfilia stops Svee before they can leave. Svee begs her to run, but Minfilia gives her no choice — she can’t explain, not now, but she feels the need to stay behind, something is calling her, go, go. She unties her ribbon from her hair and ties it quickly around Svee’s wrist, pleading with her to go, and to return the ribbon when they reunite.

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HEAVENSWARD

Approximate time frame: 2 years
Classes: Gladiator, Blacksmith/Armorer

With the rest of the Scions banished from Ul’dah and forced into Ishgard, Svee instead pushes her way toward her homeland of Ala Mhigo. Blinded by her grief, Svee begins to refuse contact from all the Scions, who are trying in desperation to reach her and make sure she is okay.Ishgard needs her help — she declines. The Scions want her back — she declines again.Heartbroken, Svee vows to find Minfilia again; she continues to keep in touch with F’lhaminn, and knows that no body has been found. Her wife is out there, somewhere, and she knows she can find her. But the silence is deafening, and Svee’s only instinct is to isolate herself with her grief.Her desire to find Minfilia turns into a tunnel-visioned obsession, and she becomes extremely uncooperative. The Scions are pleading for her to return, and the Dragonsong War advances. She remains distant. A rift forms between her and her friends — particularly between her and Thancred, who were previously near-inseparable. Her stark refusal to cooperate or be civil with Aymeric puts a stain on her already-dampened reputation.Many believed Svee had never been the Warrior of Light at all, but they lamented the loss of the supposed hero, nonetheless. “The Warrior of Light is lost to us,” people say. “The War will never end.”But the War does end, with little intervention from Svee — the Scions, championed by Alphinaud, succeed against Nidhogg nonetheless, and Svee remains silent in Ala Mhigo. Now with a year without Minfilia, she throws herself into work as a blacksmith for the Revolution, keeping her head low and her helmet on. She cloaks herself in false anonymity, hoping that she can hide from her problems and they’ll simply go away.Svee finally responds to communications from the Scions as they announce their new mission — searching for the missing Antecedent. Reluctantly, she rejoins the group, but pointedly keeps her distance from the others.Minfilia is said to be lost in the aether. Y’shtola was lost in the aether, and Y’shtola returned. That alone gave her hope.

The Sharlayans possess a construct to peer into the aether — the Anti-Tower. The Scions advance toward the Tower’s pinnacle, and at the peak, they find her.The Word of the Mother, she says. Minfilia looks different — she is etherial, eyes aglow, floating delicately above the surface. Through her, Hydaelyn explains a world in peril. She tells the story of the conflict between herself and Zodiark, and of the reflections of the world they know as the Source. Hydaelyn explains that she, and Minfilia in tandem, are embarking on a mission to one of the world’s reflections in an attempt to halt the Ascian’s plans to force another Calamity.The Scions, understanding but mourning, bid their farewells to Minfilia.Svee does not — instead, she comes undone.Svee stares into Minfilia’s eyes, but she can’t see her. She does not recognize the Word of the Mother as her wife, the one she has spent over a year searching for. She hears the Scions giving their goodbyes, and she becomes more and more confused and enraged. How are they being so understanding about this? Minfilia is leaving to another world, one they had never heard of before, to save people she has never spoken to? What about the world here and now? Minfilia had never spoken about a mission to another world, had never told Svee that she planned to sacrifice her own body to Hydaelyn. To Svee, this wasn’t the Minfilia she knew. It couldn’t be.Minfilia, speaking fully as herself for a moment, begs Svee to understand, but it does not get through. She attempts to calm Svee down, but instead, Svee spirals beyond her own control.What this entails, exactly, will be expanded upon in a 50+ page comic. Please look forward to it. :)

STORMBLOOD

Approximate time frame: 2 years
Class: Warrior

In this expansion, Svee is not “leading”. She is not a WOL who can be involved in everything, and she lets Lyse and others take the reins this time. She is primarily a bodyguard figure, the muscle of the group. This does not, however, dispel Zenos’ fascination with her, and her internal conflict still remains unaddressed. In timelines where I have co-WOLs, Svee lets the other WOL take the lead.

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SHADOWBRINGERS

Approximate time frame: 2 years
Class: Warrior

[text]

Svee believes Red. With everything they've said, and everything Svee knows, she finds it hard to not believe them.She shakes her head. "It's so much to put on you. I want better for you. But…" She puts her hands on Red's shoulders, suddenly pleading. "If what you say will happen… If I fail, I need you to kill me.""I know," says Red. Their heart is heavy. "You’ve asked me that before."

Svee can’t say anything. There is nothing to say that can make that burden any lighter, take the solemnity from their eyes. Instead, she laughs — a short hah. “It is funny,” she says, hands on her hips. “I never wanted kids. And now I have two. You didn’t give me a choice, did you? Neither of you. Stubborn girls.” She grins. “Like your mother.”
Red tilts their head, but they laugh, too. “Mother would say the same about you.”Svee snorts. “She always had something to say about me.”

POST - 5.0

Class: Valkyrie

[text]

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ENDWALKER

Approximate time frame: 1-2 months
Class: Valkyrie

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i haven't figured it all out yet. come back later. when 7.0 drops, i guess

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(wip) its not a ship its more like a narrative combo idk how else to describe

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god's favorite lesbians :) i like them so much :) svee's canon timeline is sort of an "AU" but i don't have a timeline that follows the game more strictly. this IS core to her story and i cant remove any part of it even if it doesnt happen ingamethis is ONLY a summary and i hope to expand on a lot of the smaller things in my comics, i draw a lot of cute things but they start out as a cute and simple romance and it turns into something so big it interferes with the fate of the world. please know i love "we broke up but still love each other and met later and got to try again", weird religious bullshit, and characters not realizing a relationship is going bad until theyre forced to confront it. svee IS toxic early on and they are forced separate until she learns and actively wants to do better. more meta at the endi'm currently rewriting all of this, sorry! come back later

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• playlist (sad one)

SOME ASSORTED RANTS/META STUFF

svee obviously married minfilia out of love, but i think she also sees it as an oath as a knight would take.not to be locked tomb brain but i have been craving the necro/cav relationship before knowing about the necro/cav relationship. the capacity for codependency, the fervent devotion. svee is just minfilias cavalier and minfilia is her necromancer. its about the devotion. its about how the cavalier has to consider their life to revolve around their necromancer and see themselves as their guardian while also seeing themselves as expendable. its about the equal balance of power that a bodyguard/charge or knight/princess dynamic doesnt have. i was trying to describe their dynamic in ARR to a friend who really Gets them and has written them for me before, and friend just said back “its literally necro/cav”svee would not die for any person or any cause. but she would for minfilia if minfilia asked. if minfilia asked her to she would do anything. she sets aside her own desires for this. this is not what minfilia wants.minfilia tells her when they meet in the antitower that its not like that, svee didnt fail her, she chose to go, but svee sees it as a personal failure. svee thinks she let hydaelyn take minfilia. its a reflection on her flawed way of thinking that the world is against the two of them (because the world has always been against her, and she draws minfilia into being an extension of her world, so they are the only two who matter). svee thinks she should have stayed in the tunnels and gotten them both out of there. (there is no way that this could have happened.)minfilia and svee are at odds because svee is self-preserving (wants to protect minfilia + herself as a Unit at all costs) but minfilia is self sacrificing (will do anything she can to benefit all of humanity, if possible, even if that means leaving svee behind) but in the end minfilia also does it for svee and svee hates it so much because she never asked, she saw it as her responsibility to take care of them both. in her eyes, by failing to protect minfilia, she has failed. svee has never loved anything enough to fear letting go. shes really never had this level of love at all.they HAVE to break up because svee’s near-fanatical devotion to protecting minfilia overshadows minfilia’s own wants and desires, they have to have that separation because (esp with moen's death and nabriales) svee gets increasingly insistent on being her protector and less focused on listening to her.... they make me nuts. their relationship is NOT healthy in ARR because of svee’s refusal to see outside of herself and accept that minfilia made choices that do not involve her, and minfilia unintentionally feeding into svee’s obsession with being her knight and protector. it’s not even an apparent issue at first, because the stakes were so low — they start dating really early in ARR, so none of this has come to a head yet!! and thats why im so crazy abt them because svee has to WORK for it, minfilia does not come back in AU until svee gets her shit together and this is EXACTLY why they break up. svee HAS to realize that she can want to be minfilia’s supportive and protective butch without being overbearing and overprotecting and denying her any agency in the process. she does love minfilia. she just initially loves minfilia very selfishly, and she has to go thru everything SHB puts her thru in order to recognize this.i usually focus on post-shb AU or early ARR because fluffy stuff is easy but they actually get really messy and people get concerned about how both of them are feeding into each other, if thancred hadnt been Lost In The Lahabrea Sauce i think he would have been able to intervene and stop svee from getting that obsessive, but. him being removed from the scenario is also another reason it gets like this!svee has a very specific set of flaws that lead to their relationship developing this way, and those flaws and her reaction in the antitower (which u will see.. at some later date…. those who know Know.) is the absolute rock bottom of all of these issues caving in on each other. she lashes out and acts very rash. she does things she has to live with for seven years knowing those are the last things minfilia heard and saw from her, and she isn’t able to contact her for seven years! she has to go to the first, which is just absolutely haunted with the remnants of minfilia! and she has to get better. she has to learn what minfilia meant and why she left, and she has to come to understand it. and she does. eventually. she has to live with the thought that she may not get to apologize and come to terms with that (though she does, eventually). minfilia did not lie. she loves her so much, and she did this for the world and for hydaelyn, but she also did it for svee. she did it knowing svee would hate it, and she did it hoping svee would come to understand.they get a happy ending. they do retire. but. like. they gotta work for it. i gotta put them thru the blender. because svee at the start of the game/her storyline, shes not capable of holding that kind of relationship and has a breakdown when shes confronted with the fact that, despite her best efforts, shes still responsible for her bad behavior and for her flaws. she has to work on them and breaking up gives her the opportunity to even if she does it in…. the most dramatic way possible. they are cute and silly at the beginning (“two people’s first serious relationship ever begins with a one night stand that accidentally keeps going” is pretty funny) but. i like the dramatic aspects of it. minfilia ascending to demigod status is pretty damn dramatic. and not every relationship can bear that kind of thing. svee at the point she is at can’t just say “ok, i’ll miss you, love you bye”. like. taking it in that direction would be OOC for her and is really antithetical to her character. it hurts minfilia a lot too but they both spend a lot of time apart and get the chance to make amends and try again (and it goes better this time) (this was always the point of the AU)DMs with a friend because its just. i cant reword this any better honestlyfriend
the butch/femme dilemma of the butch wanting to be strong + care for her femme but neglecting that the femme is also capable of being strong + showing her care that she deserves
this is actually a story element i love bc this aspect of butchness (serving to the point of self harm and denial about how it impacts them + the people around them) is so rarely examined in stories bc butchness. doesn't exist to most people lol
there's an importance to the butch/femme dynamic about being a circle of care and protection where both find shelter and protection in the other, but butchness is largely a state of struggling to be vulnerable and let control slip for obv. reasons
so we tend to end up wanting to shoulder everything w/o regard for our own health. it's not that it's wrong to want to self preserve and be strong, it's that our follies tend to lie with not being able to find rest and solace with another and i think it's worth talking abtme
yessss... and this is like. what im trying to do w/ svee because she insists on being alone esp after her perceived failure, and only AFTER she allows others to help her and opens up and also forgives herself + apologizes to minfilia+hydaelyn are things able to change.
she has to learn its not noble or honorable to insist on shouldering your and everyone elses burdens and responsibilities alone, its self harm. thats what it is. she is not only hurting herself but the others around her by doing thisfriend
I LOVE IT THO because Svee is like this for a lot of understandable reasons, but even her best intentions and initial softening are shrouded in unprocessed pain and trauma. She's hurting Minfilia by denying her agency and cannot handle that Minfilia is also protecting her and that's where the beauty of her eventual growth in ShB comes from? She needs that time to chew on it and learn to find rest and vulnerability and admit these things to herself. And it's hard!! she's atlas, shouldering the world on her own, but she doesn't have to be but she DOES. But also fuck the world because it keeps hurting her. She's trapped in a cycle.

in summary, let’s have some more homoerotic relationships with god. svee is allowed to touch something that was holy, as a treat. i am obsessed with them (everyone knows this!) and their parallels and intertwining fates, and how all of this influences both of them. they were both chosen by hydaelyn for different reasons, have drastically different opinions and reactions to it, and minfilia can’t come back until svee accepts everything that happened — the longer she lives in denial, the more she shuts her wife out. they love each other but their views of the world (heretic vs devout) are at odds with each other, and svee enters a relationship without having processed any of her trauma, and refuses to admit when she is wrong. they get better. even when they break up they're still terminally married because everything they do is for each other and in each other's memories.also i drew them as cats. look.

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coming soon :)

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big kitty!
she's svee, but she's not svee, but also she still is kinda svee.
it's complicated.i'll explain more later.

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